ambiguity

July 18, 2010

New Rules SG #3

Filed under: New Rules — theinkhorn @ 7:29 pm

New Rule: Yaacob Ibrahim must either tender his resignation, or buy every family in Singapore a boat. Be part of the solution, Minister.

New Rule: Organizers of the YOG, along with the government, must be tried for child abuse if they insist on making those poor kids sit through the games. Yes we’re pioneers. Yes the word “olympic” is impressive. Who gives a shit? If making defenseless kids attend an event that makes golf look like a rock concert just to make up the numbers fills you with pride, call a doctor.

New Rule: Watch where you aim your cameras, photogs. Never, ever try and snap a picture of a flooded street. The street may sue you for invasion of privacy. Not to worry though, our policemen will send you a friendly reminder… by detaining you for an hour. Hey, beats facing Poseidon in court.

New Rule: If we’re going to start arresting authors in Singapore now, I suggest we start with Kasandra Kong and Janet Chew. Alan Shadrake, author of “Once A Jolly Hangman – Singapore Justice in the Dock” has been arrested and will be investigated for criminal defamation. The book, written about the mandatory death penalty, was launched just last night. The MDA claims that the book has not been banned, yet bookstores have been ordered to remove the book from their shelves. Staff at Kinokuniya have confirmed that the book is no longer for sale, and will not be available to order either.

Remember when you were a kid, and your mom told you not to touch the kettle while it was on the stove. Remember how you did it anyway. Well the government apparently doesn’t. You’d think they’d learned their lesson from the Fajar Generation, but their skulls seem to have a few too many layers. In any case, the arrest will only spike the already growing interest in Singapore’s death penalty laws. If the government wanted to take attention off Yong Vui Kong’s case, they’ve just hung the noose round their own necks. Now everyone knows to take Shadrake’s book seriously. Smart move, men in white.

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